Astor Matter Reminds Us that Trustworthiness is Essential When Nominating Substitute Decision Makers

Lately, the matter of Brooke Astor’s estate has been covered in the media. Like many people she had an estate plan in place which included a Durable Power of Attorney and Health Care Proxy, which nominated subsituted decision makers in the event she would lose the capacity to make important financial and/or medical decisions at some point during her elder years. She did not want to burden her family with obtaining a Guardianship and/or Conservatorship through the courts. She did end up suffering from Alzheimer’s disease and her son took over her financial powers. He just didn’t do a very good job…

The following is an exerpt from this week’s AZCentral.

Anyone who has signed a financial document has to be squirming a bit over Brooke Astor’s estate case.

Her son, Anthony Marshall, recently was convicted of stealing millions of dollars from Astor while she suffered from Alzheimer’s disease before her death. Although the case largely centered on a contested will purportedly signed by Astor, other estate-planning issues also came into play.

One was a financial power of attorney signed by Astor that gave Marshall authority to direct her affairs if she became incapacitated - and the means to steal from her.

The episode provides a wake-up call for people who use financial powers of attorney. These legal documents can be highly effective in ensuring that someone else will be around to handle financial matters for you if you’re alive but unable to do so - as in the case of mental incapacity.

A power of attorney can be as short as a page or much longer, depending on the detail desired. They’re often included with a trust, will, health power of attorney (addressing medical issues) and other estate-planning documents.

For all the benefits of using a power of attorney to avoid a potential court-supervised conservator situation, there are pitfalls, too.

In particular, you need to trust the person whom you designate to act on your behalf. And you should make sure he or she is responsible, diligent and reasonably astute.

“They really are documents that people should pay attention to,” said Denise McClain, a financial principal and attorney at wealth-management firm Lowry Hill in Scottsdale. “You’re potentially passing along a lot of power.”

Senior Centers:The Importance Elders Staying Active & Social

I’ve been trying to come up with a new slogan for area senior centers. So far I’ve come up with Senior Centers: come for the free food, stay for the crafts! or Senior Centers: It’s WAY more than BINGO!

But seriously, senior centers offer independence for aging adults. They play a very important role in the lives of elders today by encouraging them to become and remain social.

Socializing can help seniors with depression, dementia, or alzheimers. I know, you will say, Mom or Dad will not go to a senior center. Then make it easy for them. Go along with your parent for the day. Make it an outing and then take them to lunch. In most communities any aging adult who is 60 years old or older can join a senior center. You can also see the things that a senior center has to offer that Mom or Dad might be interested in or enjoy.   Knowing that your parent is at a center, or on an escorted day-trip can reduce the stress and anxiety you may have about your parents sitting home watching television all day or being alone. The main thing is to get them out and about.

Senior centers allow elders to develop a social network by making and meeting new friends. Senior centers offer programs and services like crafts, bingo, fitness, dances classes, travel to museums, computer classes, health screenings, informational speakers, daily meals, birthday luncheons to celebrate each member’s birthday and much more. Many senior centers also offer outings to do things such as live performances, fall foliage tours, and tours of Newport Mansions. Your loved one gets out of house, has an opportunity to socialize, while getting some light exercise and enjoying a good meal with great friends. Each senior center usually publishes a monthly calendar with a schedule of daily activities or programs.

To get your elder started, sign them up at your local center and tell them that they do not need to go everyday. They can start once a week, playing bingo, let’s say. This way they will not feel pressured. You will see that before you know it, Mom and/or Dad will be visiting the senior center on a daily basis. Suddenly catching up on their favorite television program may not be a priority anymore. (But hey, that’s what TiVo is for!)

So what if your parent/loved suffers from Alzheimers/Dementia and is too far gone to meaninfully participate at a Senior Center? Why not explore Adult Day options? These programs offer the socialization that some say is vital to keeping the disease at bay while also providing a safe, secure environment, specifically catered to your parent’s needs.

Check out this listing of Worcester area senior centers.

Thank you to Senior Living for contributing material for this blog.

Elder Mediation: A Great Option to Diffuse Family Tensions When Planning for Elder Care

Can’t we all just get along?  

I see it more and more and it really saddens me: families unable to “get along” when it comes to decision making for elder loved ones. It can be as simple as whether Mom and/or Dad need to meet with an Elder Law Attorney, to concerns over finances and inheritance issues, to whether siblings agree on who should serve as primary caregiver, and/or to whether assisted living/nursing home care is necessary.

Often as family members age, family dynamics can become more complicated. Conflicts that have simmered below the surface can boil up and make conversation impossible. Sometimes the elders are involved in the discussions, but unfortuntately sometime they are too far gone to meaninfully participate.

Either way, even the most harmonized family can sometimes hit a bad note or two and require some assistance.

(Dun, dun, dun, dun!) Enter the Elder Mediator. Mediation provides an opportunity for the Elder and all concerned members of the family to participate in creating a thoughtful plan for future. In most cases Elder Law Attorneys can act as Elder Mediators with certain issues. However the scope of the disagreements can often rest in other issues that are not related to the elder law topic. An Elder Mediator, working closely with your Elder Law Attorney, is trained to assist families in identifying the real issues, separating them from the crucial issues of planning for elder care, and developing the best plan of care.

National Public Radio has recognized the usefulness of elder mediation for families dealing with aging issues.

As baby boomers age and options for their care increase, we will all face many difficult choices concerning how we handle transitions during our elders’ declining years. Families will have to be able to evaluate resources, options and develop flexible strategies to support their elders. Even when not legally competent to make decisions, it is important to include an elder’s wishes and expressed preferences when putting a plan into place. Elder mediation is a rational first step for families to help them address their changing needs while enhancing problem solving/communications skills and avoiding messy litigation.

Major Life Events Provide an Opportunity for your Estate Plan Review

Last night I spoke at the Lutheran Health Care Center in Worcester. One attendee asked, “How often should I review my current estate plan?” It is very important to review your family’s financial and estate plan at least every 3-5 years. The general rule is that the older you are, the more frequent your reviews should be.

Another way to determine when you should schedule a review is when you or your family is/will be experiencing a major life event. Some examples of major life events include:

• Marriage (yourself or your child)
• Divorce (yourself or your child)
• Birth of a child or grandchild
• Death of a spouse or child
• Change jobs with significant increase or decrease in income
• Retirement
• Purchase new/additional real estate
• You move to another state or country
• Start, close, or sell a business
• Major Illness or disability of self, spouse, or child
• Life Insurance/annuities
• Wanting to make major gifts to friends, family, and/or charity
• Major change in tax law

So, how are you supposed to keep track of “major changes in tax law?” Don’t worry. That’s where I come in. Every time there is a major change in a tax or estate planning law thay may effect your estate plan, I’ll send a letter out to you informing you of the change and suggest an estate plan review. Additionally, you’ll receive a similar letter if I haven’t sat down with you in the last five years.

As more major life events, how can I keep track of when ALL my clients have a baby, get divorced, change jobs, retire, etc. I’d love to, however, simply put, I can’t. That’s where you come in. Always remember to keep your estate planning and elder law attorney informed when major life events occur. That way I can determine if a review is necessary for your particular situation.

Why I Also Make Housecalls

While some clients book traditional consultations at my office, I always make myself available for home visits with my clients. While the idea of a housecall has gone the way of black & white televisions, I find that meeting clients in their home, on their “turf,” helps make what is usually an emotional process, a bit more comfortable. In their home, clients tend to be more relaxed and at ease. The conversation goes a different way and I can sense the pride they have in sharing their home with someone. Coffee and tea flow more easily and taste better from your favorite mug than a styrofoam cup.

As an elder law attorney, our conversation eventually moves to the business at hand and it’s much much easier for a client to get an idea of what they’ll be leaving behind if the items are right there. Important paperwork is never forgotten as it’s right where the client always keeps it. Clients tend to be more thoughtful and less distracted when in a familiar environment. With so much legal language to deal with, it’s better for a client to be relaxed and more attentive.

Ultimately, a home visit allows me to get to know my client and understand their needs better. It gives me the chance to be attentive to them without outside distraction. With seniors, I can also see their current state of living, if they have all the things they need and maybe attend to some previously unaddressed issues. What many might see as a bother - a housecall - I consider an honor and a blessing.